Why I never buy clothes for Baby Showers

And what I buy instead

There are a few things the entire world agrees on, and one of them is that tiny clothes for tiny humans are ridiculously cute and often result in involuntary high pitch squeals. So very tiny. So very cute. Trust me, I know. So you’re not wrong for wanting to buy all of the adorable small wardrobe items, but here are a few things to be mindful of before you do:

1. We only get a few chances in life to dress our own little human. Unless your friends are vying for a Cheaper By The Dozen reality show, this may be the only small person they get to dress. Don’t take that away from them. We all have different ideas, so you risk not being on the same page as them.
2. Babies don’t need that many clothes. And they grow out of them at rapid fire pace. If your aim is to buy a gift that will be well-used and long-loved, clothing is not it. If your aim is to help keep down a financial cost of prepping for a newborn, again buying clothing is not really it.
3. Be aware of the environmental impact. My little human is not even seven months old yet, and the amount of clothing he has outgrown without ever wearing is staggering and heartbreaking. I never intended to be wasteful, but he just ended up with so much more than he needed. 

I had been warned by someone not to buy any clothes, as people would gift them to me but I thought this to be really unfair (oi, I have a mood board here) – and also stress inducing to wait until the last moment to see what I have and don’t have. The benefit of buying myself was not only that I loved everything and was able to construct a better mix & match palette, but I bought many items on sale and also some high quality secondhand things in a bid for sustainability (the irony of then ending up with too many new clothes going unused is not lost on me). 

I also made a registry with Babylist (not sponsored! Just love their offering) with anything I else I was needing or would love to have. Being outside of the USA I was unable to add items from their own Babylist Store, however their registry allows one to add items from any stores worldwide which is super great if you have loved ones in multiple countries like me. I love a registry! There is nothing better than giving a gift you know someone will really love and make use of. I’m also a big fan of group gifts, and am always happy to organise them. I highly recommend having a registry if you are organising a baby shower / even just pre-baby if people ask about things you need or want. It is so wonderfully overwhelming how people want to bless you and your new arrival – allow them to in the best way. 

But Keeks, if not clothes, what do I buy then?!

Well, glad you asked. Here are some of my favourite things I received or have bought as a gift for a newborn:

The Group Gifts

These are generally pricey items that the new parents would really appreciate not having to purchase by themselves

• Béaba Babycook 4-in-1 Food Processor 

Not going to lie – I used this before Sawyer even started solids to make pesto for myself (sorry, not sorry). It’s fab, I love it. We’re doing a mix of Baby Led Weaning and Purées and I’ll just chuck in whatever veggies we’re eating for dinner and steam up for him. Homemade baby food is no stress. 

• Carrier / Wrap

• 

• 

My mom had really wanted to gift me a wrap and she very kindly asked which one and colour I wanted (I went with the Sollybaby in Camel, it’s lovely and has been super on fussy days). There are a lot of great carriers on the market too (we have the BabyBjörn and a lot of my friends love their Ergo Carrier). The Artipoppe keeps popping up on my socials too and they are very pretty! It’s a super great group gift if you know which one your friends would like. 

• Breast pump

Often a hefty upfront investment but so valued – particularly if the new mom plans on working and breastfeeding. Again, with quite a few different options on the market make sure you know which one would be most wanted (easy with a registry)

• Pamper That Parent

A voucher for either a pre or post-baby spa day will always be welcomed. Or perhaps a fancy meal for that first date night. Sometimes we can be so focused on the incoming little person that we forget to spoil our friends becoming new parents!

Books

Books make the perfect cherished gift. You can go with a classic, a collection, something meaningful from your own childhood or something particular for this special new family.

Some of my favourites:

• An ABC book about a special place

My go to gift for expat families in Hong Kong is this Hong Kong ABC book. This city is rather transient, and people often only live here for a short period. Many babies are born here before going off to live somewhere else, so it’s lovely for them to have a piece of the city they first arrived in with them as they grow.

We also have this ABC book as my partner and I are both South African and we want Sawyer to know his roots (we’d also love for his citizenship to be approved and a passport granted… if only this helped!)

• Dr Seuss

We were gifted this great collection of Dr Seuss Early Readers which will be gold in a few years as Sawyer learns to read. 

And while I was pregnant I received the most gorgeous adaptation “Oh Baby, The Places You’ll Go” meant to be read to your bump. I could never get through it without crying, it’s so lovely. 

I’ve also gifted The Lorax for its beautiful and important message. 

• Anything Julia Donaldson

She’s my favourite children’s author to read out-loud.

Go with something that you love or you know the family you’re buying for will love. I’ve learnt the hard way that not every book on the classic ‘must-have’ list is something I enjoy. Also consider books about equality and inclusivity. Here are some on Sawyer’s current wishlist:

• Ada Twist, Scientist
• How Many Ways Can You Say Hello
• Little Guides To Great Lives: Nelson Mandela
• An ABC of Equality
• Here We Are
• All Are Welcome
• Be Kind

Individual Gifts

• Nappies

Whether reusable or disposable, all nappies will be appreciated! Reusables in particular are expensive upfront (though cheaper in the long-run) so can be a great gift if you know what the parents want. I’d already bought a few reusables to try but was really thankful for the eco disposables I received at my shower. They’re pricier than the mainstream disposable brands so great to be helped out with. I also really love my reusable terrycloth wipes that we use at home.

• Bath Items

Sawyer only started using baby bath products after six month as we were happy hippies and used excess breastmilk until then (highly recommend to keep extra from unfinished bottles etc for bath time!) but have loved now using the Lovekins we were gifted and we also have some sheep milk soap from a friend’s travels in New Zealand we will try soon. We were also gifted some lovely wash cloths (one set has embroidered Bum & Face options and another has his name personalised on them). We got some towels which we love and use all the time – a super soft one from M&S and this beautiful one by Malabar Baby. Haakaa makes a lovely goat wool baby hairbrush that is useful and pretty to look at. And of course a little rubber duck – a classic that he LOVES. 

• Bibs

I thought we had way too many but then he started teething and he’s an absolute drool monster. I’ve found the neckerchief kind great for general drool life and the more square variety good for feeding (bottles and now under silicone bib if clothed and eating).

• Dummies

We hadn’t bought any, not because we’re anti-dummy (and some people are, so make sure you know your crowd) but we just hadn’t gotten around to it. My friend’s mom got us this little Haakaa one and it was a lifesaver for a few months. (He’s now over dummies, which is fine. But this was very loved for a while!) It’s great as you stick your finger in the middle to help baby get their suck on). We also moved onto these Bibs ones for a bit – they come in the best colours!

• Teethers

Is it a registry without a Sophie la Girafe? We actually have two – one full sized, and one travel one that comes on outings with us as it fits so easily in our nappy bag. We also have two other great teether toys  – Sawyer’s first two teether popped out at 4 months so we’ve been teething a lot of his little life!

• Food Things

Before you know it, that little newborn will branch out from the milky life. Weaning comes with allll sorts of new stuff! I love our little Liewood set of a bib, cup and teether. We also have this Liewood bib as well as a great suction bowl and various spoons and containers. If your friends have the old favourite IKEA Antilop high chair you can also pimp it out with items from Yeah Baby Goods – we are waiting on our order to arrive!

• Swaddles / Burp cloths

Gosh do babies spit up a lot. And just mess in general. I had ordered quite a few swaddles myself off AliExpress – they were super as I used them for everything: sheet on the stroller bassinet, spit up cleaning, feeding cover, bassinet cover for napping when out and about, cover over his Sleepyhead pod as we don’t have an extra – the list goes on! His little newborn eyes loved staring at the black and white patterns. 

I also got some really cute Hong Kong themed ones as gifts from The Wee Bean. 

I adore these burp cloths (ours are brown/beige though) from Carters in the US but got a friend to bring them over for me as the international shipping is ridiculous. I haven’t found any locally like this but did order the Aden & Anais pair for a friend recently – these double up as a bib. 

• Toys / Teddies

With such a variety and so many changes in development, this has been one area where I’ve loved being able to whip out something new on a random Thursday afternoon because someone had gifted us something and it’s been waiting in the cupboard for a good moment. We also have some very special soft toys from some of my favourite people and I think of them whenever I look at those teddies.

• Feeding Bra’s / Tops

I definitely underestimated how often I’d need to wash my feeding bras and therefore how many I would actually need! This Bond’s one is a gift I liked so much I ordered another of. Feeding cami’s are great too. ASOS has a super range of feeding bra’s that are not granny looking (seriously, why does so much gross underwear exist?) and I even have a bra from Victoria Secret Pink that is not a nursing specific bra but works great and is super comfy! (And got husband compliments haha). I did a photoshoot for Milkitrain when Sawyer was almost three weeks, and totally live in their t-shirts now when I’m not wearing deep-sided active wear.

• Post Partum / Breastfeeding Essentials

Particularly if you’ve been there before, put together a nice hamper of things you found helpful for the fourth trimester, birth recovery and breastfeeding (if they are). Peri bottles, nipple balm – you know what was helpful!

• Really nice pyjamas / comfy gown

Early motherhood feels a lot of things but not glamorous. If ever there was a time where PJs should make you feel awesome its the fourth trimester (though I have also come to realise we should absolutely love what we sleep in anyway!). I found the best style for me was the button-down pyjama shirt. Easy for breastfeeding. No squish feelings on the tummy – the tummy that changes shape so drastically that first month. C-section and nappy/giant pad friendly!

• A beautiful nappy bag / clutch

I adore my Jean Kelly nappy backpack. It’s a really convenient style for city-life and gender neutral for whatever kind of parents you’re gifting to. I also love this clutch style from Ben & Ellie baby – sleek and stylish! I have their reusable wipes pouches which are super to keep just the right amount of wet wipes with you without having to constantly buy the small packs.

• Offers of Service

We have two little dogs that for a long time were the babies in our lives. Having friends offer to take them on long walks / hikes was so helpful (Babylist Registries have an option to request such things, so an easy way to let your village know what you need). Meals are always welcome, and a schedule of home cooked happiness can be so enjoyed. Perhaps over to take older siblings out for playdates / fun etc.

Any clothes you have loved receiving?

Absolutely! This isn’t a hard and fast rule – I just think it’s great to have a broader think and be aware that clothes don’t have to be the ONLY gift option. Clothing gifts I’ve loved include:

• white newborn-sized vests & onesies (I didn’t want to buy too many newborn sized things, as I figured he would be a big baby but these were so easy and helpful in the first days). If you do buy full onesies go for zippers (no poppers!) and bonus points for double zippers.
• Special items either from a certain place or brand that I wouldn’t be able to get myself / would consider a bit of a spoil or something a little extra.

Any other tips?

Ask about colours / themes! Some people care more than others, but how great to give a gift that will match the new little one’s room. I kept Sawyer’s gender a secret in an attempt to avoid blue, blue and only blue. His room is earthy neutrals with a lot of mustard and sage (if you follow me on instagram you’ll see me often joke about #sageandmustardeverything and whether I have a real problem…). Maybe they’re going dusty pink and soft beige or grey-tone neutrals; maybe it’s a jungle or foxes or just bold & bright colours.

It's all fab - add to their fun! 

If you’re based or gifting in Hong Kong, one of my favourite online stores for new baby gifts is Petit Tippi – it’s full of sustainable brands and they’ve recently launched some of their own products too. You can use this nifty link to get HKD80 off your first purchase with them.